Another dementist

Do you remember Dr. Maselarovic? Well, today I have the extremely painful pleasure of presenting to you his illustrious colleague, Dr. Fluorian Maxilarian. Armenian by birth, he too seized the rare chance of being able to study at the university of Tirgu Mures, which she graduated with high grades and low spirits.

Vi-l amintiti pe domnul Dr. Maselarovic? Ei bine, azi am foarte dureroasa placere de a vi-l prezenta pe ilustrul sau coleg, Dr. Fluorian Maximilian. Armean la origine, nici el nu a ratat oportunitatea rara de a studia la unversitatea din Tirgu Mures, pe care a absolvit-o cu note mari si  veselie putina.

He now lives in Bucharest, together with his wife, well-known surrealist painter Gyngivita Maxilarian.

In prezent locuieste in Bucuresti impreuna cu sotia sa, binecunoscuta pictorita suprarealista Pulpita Maxilarian.

It would seem that the dental profession is extremely stressful, as Dr. Maxilarian has an equally serious hair deficiency in common with his above-mentioned colleague. However, apart from being follicularly challenged, Dr. Maxilarian is in excellent health and greatly enjoys cracking jokes and following them with his characteristic evil chuckle.

Se pare ca profesia de stomatolog este extrem de stresanta, deoarece Dr. Maxilarian are acelasi deficit de par in comun cu colegul sau mai sus mentionat. Totusi, in ciuda disabilitatilor foliculare, Dr. Maxilarian se bucura de o sanatate excelenta, avand deosebita placere de a face glume si de a le urma cu ranjetul lui malefic caracteristic.

He has but one source of unhappiness in his life: he can't for the life of him figure out why every child who enters his practice starts crying uncontrollably.

Nu are decat o singura sursa de nefericire in viata: nu poate cu niciun chip sa-si dea seama de ce fiecare copil care ii intra in cabinet izbucneste in hohote necontrolabile.

Quilts for babies

I don't often make quilts, but when I do, it takes me months to finish them!
Nu fac quilturi foarte des, dar cand fac, imi ia luni sa le termin!

However, when I do finish them, I get reports of 4-year-old boys running through the house using the quilt as a cape, then counting the cars repeatedly, then snuggling in the quilt, then counting the cars again. Are those signs of a happy customer? I think yes :)
Totusi, atunci cand le termin, mi se spune despre un anume baietel de 4 ani care a fugit prin casa folosind quiltul drept mantie, apoi a numarat masinutele in mod repetat, apoi s-a invelit in quilt, apoi si-a mai numarat o data masinutele. Oare astea sunt semnele unui client fericit? Cred ca da :)

This quilt was to go together with a Tilda bunny. Unfortunately, the neck seam burst when I was filling it. My hand stitched repair job was less than satisfactory, so Mr. Bunny ended up with an unexpected bow tie to cover up my oopsie. But shh, don't tell the customers, please let it look like I meant it all along! It looks good like that anyway, I think I might make some more elegant bowtied bunnies. 
Acest quilt a fost comandat impreuna cu un iepuras Tilda. Din pacate, cusatura de la gat a plesnit atunci cand il umpleam. Am incercat eu sa cos ruptura cu mana, dar reparatia nu arata satisfacator. Asa ca domnu' Iepure a primit un papion neasteptat care sa-mi acopere greshelutza. Dar shhh, sa nu le spuneti clientilor, lasati-i sa creada ca asta era intentia mea de la bun inceput! Oricum, arata fain asa, cred ca voi mai face iepurasi eleganti cu papion.

The above-mentioned happy customer's little sister, being newly born, had more pressing issues to attend to and refrained from commenting on her own gifts. But her quilt looked like this:
Surioara mai sus mentionatului client fericit, fiind nou nascuta, avea chestiuni mai presante de rezolvat, asa ca s-a abtinut de la exprimarea de comentarii cu privire la cadourile ei. Dar quiltul pentru ea arata asa:

It was extremely hard to find fabrics in the shades of orange requested, so I improvised! Using 3 thrifted pillow cases and some left-over fabrics I had in my stash, I stamped and painted and stamped until I managed to make all the blocks come together nicely:

Mi-a fost foarte greu sa gasesc materiale in nuantele de portocaliu cerute, asa ca am improvizat. Folosind 3 fete de perna de la second si ramasite de materiale din casa, am stampilat si am pictat si iar am stampilat, pana cand am reusit sa fac toate blocurile sa se potriveasca frumos:

The baby girl also got a colour-coordinated doll to go with her quilt:

Fetita a primit si ea o papusa asortata cu quiltul:

No, the lace flower is not there to cover up another oopsie, it was ordered like that! You just have no faith in me, do ya?
Nu, floarea de dantela nu e acolo ca sa acopere alta greshelutza,asa a fost comandata! Voi chiar n-aveti nici pic de incredere in mine, asa-i?

Bunnies and stuff

This time last year, I was lying in bed, my pitiful lingering interrupted only by bouts of vomiting and other equally unpleasant manifestations of food poisoning. I was spending what I thought were my last days on Earth... when a miracle happened! The postman brought me the parcel containing this book, which, in my terrible suffering, I had almost forgotten I had ordered. I spent a few hours in bed poring over every single page, template and image. It's just cuteness overload!

Anul trecut pe vremea asta zaceam in pat, cu lancezeala-mi intrerupta numai de varsaturi si de alte manifestari la fel de placute ale unei toxiinfectii alimentare. Imi traiam ceea ce credeam a fi ultimele mele zile pe pamant, cand miracolul s-a intamplat! Postasul mi-a adus coletul ce continea o carte de care, in suferinta mea atroce, aproape ca uitasem. Am petrecut cateva ore in pat uitandu-ma atent la fiecare pagina, fiecare imagine si fiecare tipar. Sun toate mai mult decat dulci!

 

Due to my new treasures or to my titanium immune system, not sure which, I lived not only to tell this tale, but to start making things out of the books. I started with two bunnies which turned out almost as cute as the ones in the book:

Datorita noii mele comori sau datorita sistemului meu imunitar infailibil, nu stiu exact care, am supravietuit nu numai ca sa pot spune aceasta poveste, ci si ca sa ma apuc sa fac lucruri din carti. Am inceput cu doi iepurasi care au iesit aproape la fel de draguti ca si cei din carte:

It wasn't long before they started doing.... what bunnies do best. Since, after years of crafting, I now find myself unable to follow a pattern thoroughly, I tweaked here and there: different kinds of ears, some bunnies got hats, some had names embroidered on their clothing, some were even dressed in fancy evening attire.

Nu a durat mult pana cand au inceput sa faca...ce fac iepurasii cel mai bine. Deoarece, dupa ani si ani de cusut, nu mai sunt capabila sa urmez un tipar intocmai, am modificat pe ici pe colo: diferite tipuri de urechi, unii iepurasi au primit palarii, altii broderii pe haine, altii au fost chiar imbracati in haine de seara.

 

  

 

 

 

People seem to love them, through no merit of mine but rather Tone's brilliant imagination. A couple even ended up in Canada, thus making Falushtain Inc a truly international enterprise:

Se pare ca lumea chiar ii place, dar asta nu este meritul meu ci al lui Tone si imaginatiei sale geniale. Doi iepurasi au ajuns chiar in Canada, facand Falushtain Inc o afacere cu adevarat internationala:

Although my friends don't quite understand the sketchy nature of Tilda's dolls and think it's cruel to leave them mouthless, it's precisely this quality I like. I think it looks even better on the fairies. I also tweaked this pattern, combining a couple of existing patterns from the book, and making everything smaller. 

Desi prietenii mei nu prea inteleg natura schematica a papusilor Tilda si li se pare crud sa le lasi fara gura, mie tocmai asta imi place. Cred ca asta arata cel mai bine la zanute. Le-am modificat un pic si pe ele, combinand mai multe tipare si facand totul mai mic:

 

This last one was adopted by J'ai Bistrot, the host of most of our fairs. She hovers in the window, guarding the customers' safe, albeit drunken passage to their homes.

Aceasta ultima zana a fost adoptata de J'ai Bistrot, gazda targurilor noastre. Pluteste in fereastra, veghind calatoria ametita a clientilor spre casa.

 

This is only the beginning of a long love affair with the Tilda brand, whose every creation is breathtakingly sweet to me and just begging to be made.

Acesta e doar inceputul unei relatii lungi si iubitoare cu marca Tilda, ale carei creatii pur si simplu cer sa fie facute.

New-faced cutie

This is only about what is becoming a pretty standard cute-doll-with-name-pillow combination, except this time I tried a new way of painting her face. I think it results in a more expressive face than before, and I fell in love with her instantly (how narcissistic is that!).

Azi e vorba doar de ceea ce devine o combinatie standard de papusa cu pernita brodata cu nume. Cu exceptia faptului ca de data asta am incercat un nou mod de a-i picta fatza. Cred ca e mai expresiva decat fetzele dinainte, si m-am indragostit de ea instantaneu (ce narcicista-s!)

It was very hard to let her out of my loving arms, but I take comfort in the thought that somewhere in this city, Boroka is one happy baby, peacefully cuddling her doll to sleep.

A fost foarte greu sa-i dau drumul din bratele mele iubitoare, dar ma consoleaza gandul ca undeva in orasul asta, Boroka, un copil fericit, isi imbratiseaza papusa in somn.

I can do other stuff too!

Actually, I can even paint upholstered furniture, but that's another story.

Stiu sa fac si alte chestii! De fapt, stiu si sa vopsesc mobila, dar asta-i alta poveste.
 
Right now I'll just show you a new product of the Falushtain creative line: diary and notebook covers. I love making these, they allow for infinite creativity. Making one generally gives me ideas for 5 more, and I just can't stop myself from making just one more. 

Acum o sa va arat doar un nou produs marca Falushtain: copere pentru agende si caiete. Imi place la nebunie sa le fac, poti sa fii creativ la nesfarsit cu ele. In timp ce fac una imi vin idei pentru altele cinci, si uite-asa nu ma mai pot opri.

Apart from the fact that making them is pure fun, I get to use all those little scraps I am loathe to throw away. And if I continue at this pace, at least I will have gained a head start on Xmas presents! :)
Pe langa faptul ca e fain sa lucrez la ele, apuc sa-mi folosesc si toate ramasitele pe care mi-ar fi greu sa le arunc. Si daca continuu in ritmul asta, macar am un mic avans la cadourile de Craciun :)

Summer fair

Siii, inca unul!
Aaand another one!

Fair report

Psst! Come closer! I wanna tell you something, but it's kind of a secret.... Ok, are you listening?

Psst! Hai mai aproape! Vreau sa-ti spun ceva, dar e cam secret... OK, asculti?

 

A few weeks ago, She took us to a fair. We are used to them already: she puts us on display and people come and look and touch and say oh-look-how-cute and some of us even get adopted, which is a bit heartbreaking, if you ask me, as I never get to see my brothers again, but I guess it's also a good thing, as we muckla are curious beings and it's always good to see other places and live in other people's drawers, since frankly I'm quite sick of the shelf I have to live on at home, where She puts us for weeks on end and nobody comes to play with us unless maybe that new baby comes to visit and nibbles on us a little.

Acum cateva saptamani, Ea ne-a dus la un targ. Deja suntem obisnuiti cu ele: ne expune si vin oamenii si se uita si pun mana si zic vai-uite-ce-dragut si unii dintre noi sunt chiar adoptati, ceea ce e un pic tragic dupa parerea mea, pentru ca nu mai apuc sa-mi vad fratii niciodata, dar presupun ca e si ceva bun, fiindca noi mishumacii suntem fiinte curioase si intotdeauna e fain sa vezi alte locuri si sa locuiesti in sertare la altii, ca sincer sa spun m-am cam saturat de raftul pe care trebuie sa locuiesc acasa, unde Ea ne pune sa stam saptamani de-a randul si nu vine nimeni sa se joace cu noi, numai daca nu vine copilu' ala nou din cand in cand si ne rontzaie un pic. 

But what She doesn't know, and I bet you didn't know either, is that we don't really stand still. I mean, come on, we are alert intelligent inquisitive extremely bright beings, and shelves are just too boring. So, whenever people aren't looking, we wander in search of shiny things. We love shiny things. Some of us go shopping...
Dar ceea ce nu stie ea, si pun pariu ca nici tu nu stiai, este ca noi nu prea stam linistiti. Adica, sa fim seriosi, suntem fiinte inteligente, curioase, extrem de alerte, si rafturile sunt pur si simplu prea plictisitoare. Asa ca, ori de cate ori nu se uita oamenii, noi plecam in cautare de lucrusoare stralucitoare. Ne place tare mult tot ce straluceste. Unii din noi merg la cumparaturi...

I swear, if she brings home any more shiny stuff, I'm going to throw her off the shelf, we are crowded enough as it is, fabrics and us and button jars and more of us and boxes and all.
Pe cuvant, daca asta mai aduce acasa multe chestii lucioase, o arunc de pe raft, deja suntem destul de inghesuiti si asa, cu materiale si cu noi si borcane cu nasturi si iarasi noi si cutii si tot felu'. 

I personally am one who appreciates art, so I wandered onto Carmen's shelves, to admire her creations. Exquisitely crafted, I tell you!

Eu personal sunt un admirator al artei, asa ca m-am plimbat un pic pe rafturile lui Carmen, ca sa-i admit creatiile. Impecabil executate, va spun!

Greenie here is the more studious kind, and he always manages to find something to inspect, research or explore: fimo creations...

Greenie al nostru e genul mai studios, el tot timpul gaseste ceva de inspectat, de cercetat sau de explorat: creatii din fimo...

...or even new species. Much to our delight, he discovered these creatures that are called stripeys apparently and they are all a bit silly but then who am I to judge, since many people call us silly too, which we most definitely are not.

...sau chiar specii noi. Spre marea noastra incantare, a descoperit creaturile astea care cica se numesc stripey si sunt cam natangi dar in fond cine sunt eu sa judec, doar si noua ne zice multa lume ca suntem natangi, desi nu-i adevarat deloc.

 

The stripeys are friends with this big creature the name of which I don't know and Greenie didn't manage to find out either, even if he looked through his books and even dared ask the thing what it was, but it didn't say anything.

Stripey astia sunt prieteni cu o creatura mare care nu stiu cum se numeste si nici Greenie n-a reusit sa afle, desi s-a uitat prin carti si chiar a indraznit sa-l intrebe pe animal ce e, dar n-a zis nimic.

This other brother of mine is such a sucker for cuddly things, and I just couldn't get him to stop throwing himself in amongst the cushions. But I have to say, Flavia's pillows were just thoo thoft...
Alt frate de-al meu adora lucrurile moi, si nu l-am putut opri sa se arunce repetat intre pernele Flaviei. Dar trebuie sa recunosc, pernele eu sunt asa de moooi...

ahh...

Oh, did I mention we like shiny stuff?

A, oare v-am spus ca ne plac lucrusoarele stralucitoare?

All in all, we had a great time, even if we have to interrupt our activities and pretend we're sitting nicely on the shelf every time someone turns around. It's a tough life, but someone has to do it, otherwise there's be no more fun left in this world, and that would be such a pity. Wouldn't it?

Oh! As i said, don't tell anyone! Deal?

Pana la urma ne-am distrat foarte bine, chiar daca trebuie sa ne intrerupem activitatile si sa ne prefacem ca stam frumos pe raft de fiecare data cand se intoarce cineva. E o viata grea, dar cineva trebuie s-o faca si pe asta, altfel n-ar mai fi niciun pic de veselie in lume si asta ar fi mare pacat. Asa-i?

A, si, dupa cu spuneam, sa nu spui nimanui! Bine?

Another fair!

Ladies and gents, we are doing it again! This fair is not of my making, but I can't wait to take part in it. If you are in the area, come visit!

Doamnelor si domnilor, o comitem din nou! Acest targ nu e creatia mea, dar de-abia astept sa particip. Daca sunteti in zona, haideti si vizitati-ne! Detalii pe afis :)

Prof. Rashid

As you might have figured out already, Falushtain is a nation of sophisticated intellectuals. Professors, musicians, philosophers, be they dead or alive, have all found a good home in this realm.
Dupa cum va imaginati deja, Falushtainul este o natiune de intelectuali sofisticati. Profesori, muzicieni, filozofi, fie ei morti sau vii, si-au gasit cu totii caminul pe acest taram.

A while ago, I introduced to you Prof. Basil, the die-hard erudite tutor. Now is the time for you to meet one of Basil's closest friends, Prof. Rashid.
Acum catva timp vi l-am prezentat pe Prof. Basil, meditatorul erudit si greu de ucis. Acum este timpul sa-l cunoasteti pe unul din cei mai apropiati prieteni ai lui Basil, si anume Prof. Rashid.

 

Actually, time or no time, his fame can hardly be contained any longer. His knowledge of ...well, everything, his accessible but highly informative style of writing, as well as his legendary good looks have made him known all over the world.  But let me talk about each in turn.
De fapt, fie ca e timpul sau nu, faima lui nu mai poate fi stavilita. Cunostintele lui in materie de...pai, cam orice, stilul informativ dar accesibil in care scrie, precum si frumusetea lui legendara l-au facut cunoscut peste tot in lume. Dar sa vorbesc despre fiecare pe rand.

Born in Calcutta, India, Rashid grew up speaking three languages. Sometimes all at once, much to the confusion of his parents, who were in awe of his precocious linguistic intelligence. Recognizing their son's potential, they sent him to Falushtain, to the Kindergarten for Freaks and Unusually Clever Kids (K-FUCK, as it is more commonly known). This penchant for multitasking did not leave young Sheik; he read 3-4 books at once, went to 2 high-schools at the same time and obtained three PhD's. Just because he could. One from the University of Sorbonne, with the paper The Philosophy of Punctuation; One from the University of Uppsala, with the paper Separation Anxiety in the Marauding Nations of the North; and one from Cambridge University, for his invaluable research work into Coulrophobia.

Nascut in Calcutta, Rashid a crescut vorbind 3 limbi. Uneori pe toate deodata, spre confuzia parintilor sai, care erau uimiti de inteligenta lingvistica precoce a fiului lor. Recunoscand potentialul copilului, l-au trimis in Falushtain, la Gradinita pentru Ciudati si Plozi Deosebit de Destepti. Inclinatia lui spre multitasking nu l-a parasit  pe micul Sheik  nici in anii ce au urmat; citea 3-4 carti odata, a mers la 3 licee in acelasi timp, si a obtinut 3 doctorate.  Numa de-aia. Unul de la Universitatea din Sorbona, cu lucrarea Filozofia Punctuatiei; unul de la Universitatea Uppsala, cu lucrarea Anxietatea de Separare la Natiunile Invadatoare din Nord; si unul de la Universitatea Cambridge, pentru munca sa de cercetare in domeniul coulrofobiei.

Of course, he was made for a brilliant academic career. He has received honorary degrees from pretty much every university that matters in this world. But even if he is an expert in a great variety of fields, his main specialty remains psychiatry. He has written many books on the topic, his latest one being Common Mental Disorders of the Modern Age, published in 2012. 
Desigur, Rashid era facut pentru o cariera academica. A primit titluri onorifice de la toate universitatile care conteaza in lumea asta. dar desi este un expert in multe domenii, specialitatea sa principala ramane psihiatria. A scris multe carti in acest domeniu, cea mai recenta fiind Tulburari Mentale Comune in Era Moderna, publicata in 2012.

Other titles from his prodigious bibliography include The Truth About Lunatics; Psychoanalysis for Dummies and The Undead Psyche, published in 3 volumes: The Psychological Profile of Zombies, The Psychological Profile of Werewolves and The Psychological Profile of Vampires.
Alte titluri din prodigioasa sa bibliografie ar fi Adevarul despre Lunatici, Psihoanaliza pentru Idioti, si Psihicul Nemort, publicat in 3 volume: Profilul psihologic de Zombie, Profilul psihologic al Varcolacului, si Profilul psihologic al Vampirului. 

He now holds a permanent position at Brian May University in Falushtain, where he teaches Chomskyan syntax, Oriental Studies and Klingon language, and researches the reproductive mechanisms of cuddlecreeps. He also travels extensively in order to promote his books and hold seminars and workshops on various topics of widespread interest.
Acum Rashid are un post permanent la Universitatea Brian May din Falushtin, unde preda sintaxa chomskiana, studii orientale si limba kligoniana, si cerceteaza mecanismele de reproducere ale creaturilor numite cuddlecreeps. De asemenea, calatoreste mult pentru a-si promova cartile si pentru a tine prelegeri si ateliere pe teme de interes public.

As for his looks...well, ladies, you can judge for yourselves. He is not quite a spring chicken anymore, but the few wrinkles he has only add character to his exotic face. Words such as "hunk", "steamy" and "I definitely would" are often heard whispered in the back of rooms where Rashid may be holding a lecture. 
Cat despre cum arata...doamnelor, puteti judeca si singure. Nu mai e chiar un fecior, dar cele cateva riduri pe care le are au adaugat caracter chipului sau exotic. Cuvinte ca "bine facut", "fain" si "sigur ca as" se aud adesea soptite in spatele incaperilor in care Rashid mai tine cate o prelegere. 

All in all, Prof. Rashid is a true Renaissance man, a highly accomplished citizen of Falushtain, who makes his country proud. If he were to run for mayor next elections, I think I might vote for him...
In concluzie, Rashid este un adevarat om al Renasterii, un cetatean plin de success al Falushtainului, care isi face tara mandra. Daca ar candida la postul de primar la urmatoarele alegeri, cred ca s-ar putea sa-l votez...